XJ6 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Broken 1993 .... ;( Looking at A4 2.4 Tiptronic Haynes Manual Translation Haynes: This is a snug fit. Translation: You will skin your knuckles Haynes: This is a tight fit. Translation: Not a hope in heck matey! Haynes: as described in Chapter 7.... Translation: That'll teach you not to read through before you start, now you are looking at scary photos of the inside of a gear box. Haynes: Pry..... Translation: Hammer a screwdriver into.... Haynes: Undo Translation: Go buy a tin of WD40 (catering size) Haynes: Retain tiny spring... Translation: "Jeeze what was that, it nearly had my eye out"! Haynes: Lightly.... Translation: Start of lightly and build uptill the veins on your forehead are throbbing them re-check the manual because this cannot be "lightly" what you are doing now. Haynes: Routine maintenance.... Translation: If it isn't broken...it's about to be Haynes: Two spanner rating. Translation: Now you think that you can do this because two is a low, tiny, :ikkle number....but you also thought the wiring diagram was a map of the Tokyo underground in fact that would have been more of use to you. Haynes: Four spanner rating. Translation: you are seriously considering this aren't you, you pleb! Haynes: Five Spanner rating Translation: OK..... but don't expect us to ride in it afterwards!!!!! Haynes: If not you can fabricate your own special like this.... Translation: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!!! Haynes: Retaining Nut..... Translation: Yes, that's it that big spherical blob of rust Haynes: Get an Assistant......... Translation: Prepare to humilitate yourself in front of your friends. Cheers....Don aka XJ6
JM485 Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Haha, that is funny. I definately know your pain, some of the areas auto makers expect you to get your hands into are a real pain. Just remember, if you think a job will take an hour, it will probably take at least 4.
mrspex Posted January 12, 2013 Posted January 12, 2013 Okay, now THAT is just hilarious! I imagine Jeremy Clarkson's voice when I read it.
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