Things I thought I would never hear myself say

[HomerS]

....and I don't mean Dad things that we shutter when we utter and realize we've morphed into that person.

1) There was a fight at my son's school and one of the other parents asked me if I knew who it was.  I said I had no idea but she sent me a link to a Facebook video and asked her "who is the teacher with the man bun?"  When I was looking for my first home, I looked outside the city I grew up in but ended up with a good deal less than a mile from where I grew up so my boys are in the same school system I went through.  I had teachers that were much older than me (some were Vietnam or Korean vets), but no 'man buns'

2) Two of my dogs have joint issues/arthritis and they were put on CBD supplements (which really helps!)  The store I go to, the owner has another business and I didn't know he owned a CBD store.  He uses it for his pets as well and has always been able to keep me stocked.  I told the wife one night, "our dogs have a weed man".

[jaymcminn]

I don't have kids, but I'm the front office manager at a medium-sized hotel and my entire staff (God help me) are young women under the age of 20. Things I never thought I'd hear myself say and have within the last few months:

"No, you can't dye your hair in unicorn colors"

"Please don't FaceTime your boyfriend while checking guests in"

"No, you can't dye your hair grey"

"Yoga pants are not suitable work attire"

"Platinum blonde is fine, as long as it's the only color"

"You're changing your preferred pronoun? So, do I have to order you men's uniform shirts now?"