Ace-Garageguy Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 (edited) ...and then there was the fella who was working for me (not for long) who constantly referred to the "torque-to-ground-ratio"... ...Car and Driver mag once referred to the suspension design in the Nissan 300ZX as "various rods and levers"... ...my know-it-all idiot neighbor was recently explaining how more back-pressure from the catalytic converter made more horsepower... ...and another fella working for me (again, not for long) said you adjust the hydraulic lifters in an old smallblock Chevy by "tightening them all the way down and then backing off until they click"... ...and then there was the 'expert' who was telling me I had to polarize an alternator after replacing it... ...and the idiot neighbor's buddy was telling me his little Acura Integra was a "R type" (it had the "Type R" emblems), but it only had 4-bolt wheels. I mentioned the lack of 5-bolt wheels to him, and he said "dub..uhuh...huh...ah...well"... . Edited November 17, 2013 by Ace-Garageguy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agent G Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 A classic one I heard form a friend was when someone saw a Honda motorcycle. Their reaction was, "that can't be a Honda, they only make cars!." Sometimes I wonder why people bother wasting air. I actually had that happen to me while stopped in a rest area on the continental divide. Insert BMW for Honda. G Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig Irwin Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 I actually had that happen to me while stopped in a rest area on the continental divide. Insert BMW for Honda. G I had a Gold Wing rider tell me that Harleys got to be much better bikes after Honda bought them and straightened 'em out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peekay Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 Not a car show, at an ancient burial site:" But they can't have lived here 3500 years ago, it's only 2013 now!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charlie8575 Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 Not a car show, at an ancient burial site: " But they can't have lived here 3500 years ago, it's only 2013 now!" ?!!?!??!!!! Place this individual on a sunny window sill and water daily. And I thought some of the kids I had when I was teaching were brain-dead... Charlie Larkin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Hall Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 Not a car show, at an ancient burial site: " But they can't have lived here 3500 years ago, it's only 2013 now!" Sounds like someone even dumber than the religious crazies that think the earth is only 6000 years old. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chuck Most Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 I had a Gold Wing rider tell me that Harleys got to be much better bikes after Honda bought them and straightened 'em out. No, no, no, Craig... Yamaha bought them out, that's why the V-Rod is so awesome. Or so a former co-worker of mine would insist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob Hall Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 No, no, no, Craig... Yamaha bought them out, that's why the V-Rod is so awesome. Or so a former co-worker of mine would insist. A coworker of mine has a Suzuki V-twin something, and he said he's had people ask him why he has a Harley engine.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ace-Garageguy Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 (edited) Not a car show, at an ancient burial site: " But they can't have lived here 3500 years ago, it's only 2013 now!" It's truly sad, but ignorance seems to know no bounds. I swear these are true stories. I met a girl in a bar many years ago, a real cutie, and she did not understand the concept of 'manufacturing'. It had simply never occurred to her tiny little brain. During the course of our conversation, I asked her where she thought everything around her came from. Her answer: "well, you just go to the mall and everything's there"...said like I was the idiot. An occasional business associate and good friend was dating an adult, professional woman in Az. for a while. They went out in the desert to look at the night sky, and he mentioned how it just blew him away to think that all those points of light were other stars like our Sun, and even galaxies of millions of stars. She adamantly disagreed, saying "They are NOT!!!. The SUN is the SUN, and those are the STARS !!! They're NOT THE SAME AT ALL !!!". The very attractive and successful female real estate agent who got me into this house countered my complaint that nothing in the house seemed to be square, level or perpendicular to anything else by saying, with a straight face "well, the house was built a long time ago, in 1969. Maybe they hadn't invented levels yet". But boy, was she a babe. Edited November 17, 2013 by Ace-Garageguy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agent G Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 It's truly sad, but ignorance seems to know no bounds. I swear these are true stories. I met a girl in a bar many years ago, a real cutie, and she did not understand the concept of 'manufacturing'. It had simply never occurred to her tiny little brain. During the course of our conversation, I asked her where she thought everything around her came from. Her answer: "well, you just go to the mall and everything's there"...said like I was the idiot. An occasional business associate and good friend was dating an adult, professional woman in Az. for a while. They went out in the desert to look at the night sky, and he mentioned how it just blew him away to think that all those points of light were other stars like our Sun, and even galaxies of millions of stars. She adamantly disagreed, saying "They are NOT!!!. The SUN is the SUN, and those are the STARS !!! They're NOT THE SAME AT ALL !!!". The very attractive and successful female real estate agent who got me into this house countered my complaint that nothing in the house seemed to be square, level or perpendicular to anything else by saying, with a straight face "well, the house was built a long time ago, in 1969. Maybe they hadn't invented levels yet". But boy, was she a babe. I dated all three of them. G Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LDO Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 "Yeah, it's real". A guy answering questions about his Lamborghini Countach. I couldn't resist. I asked why his Lamborghini has a Fiero engine. Another guy was trying to sell his Scarab (I think that's what he called it) to my younger brother for $8500. "They only made 200 of them". Uhhh...more like only added fiberglass parts to about 200 early Datsun Z cars. Oh-wrt to the good looking real estate agent; Austin has a former Playmate who sells houses. Echo Johnson. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry P. Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 I met a girl in a bar many years ago, a real cutie, and she did not understand the concept of 'manufacturing'. It had simply never occurred to her tiny little brain. During the course of our conversation... I didn't realize that talking about manufacturing was the key to picking up babes in bars... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
High octane Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 True, but keep in mind those cars are over 40 years old...the general public who may not be car enthusiasts wouldn't be familiar with such old car details... Sure the cars are over 40 years old. Why would anyone go to see new Corvettes, Chargers, Challengers, Camaros, and Mustangs when they can see them at their local auto show or at the dealers show room? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ace-Garageguy Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 I didn't realize that talking about manufacturing was the key to picking up babes in bars... Now you know the secret to success with women. You're welcome. Giving the girls your phone number written on $100 bills works well too. Actually, after we got past "what's your sign?" and "do you come here often?", she noticed my Rolex and apparently wanted to verify that I could afford her hourly rate. She asked me what I did for a living, and I started to explain that I manufactured a line of aftermarket fiberglass parts for several other companies. That's where the term "manufacture" had her looking like the proverbial deer in the proverbial headlights. And now you know the rest of the story. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DPink Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 (edited) Brad, you have a mini truck, you get a free pass on that one. I guess that was just a half conscious rant on how there are people who really give us mini truckers a hard time. The lowrider thing is more of a pet peive (SP?). It's just that, I've alays felt mini trucks are a certain niche that you either get or don't get. And the attendees usually get it. I don't know how I got so far off topic. But my real gripe, that inspired me to chime in is when people ask me why anyone would ever want to do that to a perfectly good work truck. I know how you feel. I have a 98 S10 and people always give me heck about it because they just don't know what it's like to drive a truck half the size of theirs. Edited November 17, 2013 by DPink Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Myers Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 Sure the cars are over 40 years old. Why would anyone go to see new Corvettes, Chargers, Challengers, Camaros, and Mustangs when they can see them at their local auto show or at the dealers show room? But they do. My biggest gripe about car shows. Keep your late models at home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Myers Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 (edited) My favorite : " Nice lookin' Charger, I used to have one just like it. What year is it ?" Edited November 17, 2013 by Greg Myers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Myers Posted November 17, 2013 Share Posted November 17, 2013 A buddy of mine, gassin' up his cherry V-8 Vega. A guy comes over chatting him up. Upon leaving the guy laments, " Wish I could afford one of those, as he gets into his $50,000 + suv. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nxr Posted November 18, 2013 Share Posted November 18, 2013 The SUV probably leased man! Aint nobody paying full price for them cars today! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Geiger Posted November 18, 2013 Share Posted November 18, 2013 (edited) It's truly sad, but ignorance seems to know no bounds. I swear these are true stories. I met a girl in a bar many years ago, a real cutie, and she did not understand the concept of 'manufacturing'. It had simply never occurred to her tiny little brain. During the course of our conversation, I asked her where she thought everything around her came from. Her answer: "well, you just go to the mall and everything's there"...said like I was the idiot. An occasional business associate and good friend was dating an adult, professional woman in Az. for a while. They went out in the desert to look at the night sky, and he mentioned how it just blew him away to think that all those points of light were other stars like our Sun, and even galaxies of millions of stars. She adamantly disagreed, saying "They are NOT!!!. The SUN is the SUN, and those are the STARS !!! They're NOT THE SAME AT ALL !!!". The very attractive and successful female real estate agent who got me into this house countered my complaint that nothing in the house seemed to be square, level or perpendicular to anything else by saying, with a straight face "well, the house was built a long time ago, in 1969. Maybe they hadn't invented levels yet". But boy, was she a babe. Try playing "Got Your Nose!' with them and see if they suffocate Which reminds me of a story. Many years ago we went to an amusement park with my wife's friend and her kids. We were on a cable car ride with a Chinese family, parents and a little boy maybe three. The father was obviously playing the above game with the little boy, pretending to grab his nose and saying something like "Ah say tong!" each time. The little boy thought it was hilarious and was laughing. We got off the ride and I turned to her and said, "Wasn't that neat that he was playing "Got Your Nose" ?" She turned to me and said, "Wow! You understand Chinese?" Edited November 18, 2013 by Tom Geiger Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greg Myers Posted November 18, 2013 Share Posted November 18, 2013 The SUV probably leased man! Aint nobody paying full price for them cars today! was years ago when there was an economy and people payed for what they had. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Modelmartin Posted November 18, 2013 Share Posted November 18, 2013 Many years ago after a model club meeting we retired to a local bar to define areas of common interest and consume beverages. One of our regular guys brought a relative of his wife who had just gotten out of the Navy. I ordered a Corona and he said, " You aren't going to drink that are you?". I replied that I certainly was. He claimed that Mexican beer was made of 30% urine. He was very specific about that 30%. I asked why he thought that was true and where on Earth they would gather that much urine. He said there was a newsletter passed around his ship that said that Mexican beer was 30% urine. He absolutely believed it and was unshakable. A few minutes later I told him about my model car business and how I was making a meager living at it. He thought I was lying. "There is no way you can make a living building models!" He absolutely, fervently believed something which was so obviously untrue and refused to believe something that was true and that 5 people at that table could vouch for! And he was defending our freedom and is allowed to vote and reproduce freely! We are doomed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ace-Garageguy Posted November 18, 2013 Share Posted November 18, 2013 Try playing "Got Your Nose!' with them and see if they suffocate Best laugh I've had in a long, long time... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ace-Garageguy Posted November 18, 2013 Share Posted November 18, 2013 (edited) To quote Modelmartin: "...He absolutely, fervently believed something which was so obviously untrue and refused to believe something that was true... ... and is allowed to vote and reproduce freely! We are doomed. " -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Yup. Edited November 18, 2013 by Ace-Garageguy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agent G Posted November 18, 2013 Share Posted November 18, 2013 I was walking an overtime foot beat on the St Louis riverfront. My partner and I were on the sidewalk at the base of the grand staircase which leads up to the Gateway Arch. A family of tourists approaches and the obviously exasperated father blurts out "Officer, which way to the g#####m arch?" We couldn't help ourselves, both of us pointed straight up. The man's gaze slowly followed our fingers and there, looming in all it's stainless steel glory, was the 630 foot masterpiece. The teenage members of the family stifled laughter and with much eye rolling at their dad walked away. The Missus turned to the man and began a tounge lashing I can still hear to this day. Ever hear the phrase "can't see the forest for the trees" ? G Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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