I'm very sorry Ray. I know full well the pain it causes. We had to put down our siamese, Bob back in 09, kidney failure as well, she was 19, and then 2 years ago had to put down our male, Milo, just plain old old, he was almost 22, and had quit eating, so it was time. I think he was holding on for our sakes. We held him as they did it. Hardest thing I've ever done, even harder than seeing my mom on her deathbed. I will be praying for you.