What Irked You Today?

[Modelbuilder Mark]

I doubt he was whining at all when he spent $500 on that pre-runner front bumper that'll never have a speck of mud on it, but when it comes to something the truck actually needs to operate properly? Whoa... big deal!!!!

What is the old saying, swallow a horse, choke on a fly... What Tom said, Priorities...some folks have them off kilter.

[Tom Geiger]

I talked to a lady once that was making a $700/mo car payment, and said she was struggling bcause she was a single mom for the past two years....

It makes you wonder who qualifies these folks for the loans. I used to know a guy in our hobby who was eternally broke and went from one calamity to the next. Talk about priorities, his car was repossessed while he was away at a model show for the weekend. And somehow, every time he had a vehicle repossessed, some dealer would let him have another new one. At one point he kept telling me he really wanted a new truck and it was pretty obvious he couldn't afford one. As I tried in vain to talk him out of it, he told me that I didn't understand because I had money. So I asked him, "You didn't notice that we're riding in an '89 Crown Vic with 200,000 miles on it? That's why I don't have money problems!" The next time I saw him, he had a new truck. And that one got repossessed too.

And I can say I've never taken family money for my hobbies. My kids never were compromised so I could have something. We got by fine with used cars, didn't do the biggest vacations and my kids were never hungry. We were frugal, saved and tried to set a good example for my kids. We managed to have my wife home with the kids, and I worked as much as I needed to support our family. I paid for my two girls to go to college cash. So they don't have huge college debts like their friends. And they turned out well, and manage their money like we do. Both have nice cars that are paid for, and money in the bank. I was recently out of work for a year and a half and didn't miss paying a bill. Why? Because we planned well and had money in the bank to cover it. And I wouldn't live any other way!

[FASTBACK340]

I see it all the time in my dealership. People lease the top-of-the-line SUV model, with 22" wheels… and cry like mad when told they need a new set of tires at 18K because they were never rotated or maintained with the correct pressures. Some of those tires are close to $375 EACH. This in turn forces the consumer to "shop" for whatever someone will sell them that fits, leading to ride and handling issues that they come back to US to resolve, for free… under warranty. Or return the lease car and we have to eat the replacement to re-sell, if we ground it.

Because they're in over their heads.

[niteowl7710]

The way people, who are allegedly from the same genetic stock (aka "Family"), can bring every petty difference and perceived slight out when a loved one passes. The one time you'd think everyone could set aside whatever problems they have for 48 hours, instead magnifies and amplifies them to a fever pitch.

Needless to say there's about a half-dozen people I don't feel the need to ever engage in occupying the same oxygen supply with again in their lifetime.

[Tom Geiger]

Needless to say there's about a half-dozen people I don't feel the need to ever engage in occupying the same oxygen supply with again in their lifetime.

Yes, I don't think I will ever be comfortable with my sister again. When my parents died, she wanted everything. In fact, while I still had my mother's funeral on my credit card, she was demanding the entire life insurance check. That was over 10 years ago and it will never be right.

And my wife's family is in the middle of this now. Her father died last year and her mother is an any day thing. And with five kids, and nothing in writing about funeral etc, there is a battle going on.

[cobraman]

Some people can get nasty when money is involved.

[niteowl7710]

Be something if there was money at stake, but it's just long simmering bad "relations" - in so much as Person A feels that Person B was a lower class person in life regardless of actual realities, along with Person A's insistence that they be the center of attention even though they're only family by marriage.

Edited February 14, 2014 by niteowl7710

[disabled modeler]

Man that is a tough situation but to me Id think the loss of the loved one is much more important than the money,etc. long as there is enough to cover their final expenses....not that I really have anything but I told my wife if there is any problems once my time is up remind everyone what I said...if there is put everything in a pile and burn it all make them watch if its apparent its a greed thing. Dont get me wrong if someone wants something of special interests to them that is fine and I understand it completely. I have some of my dads stuff and it means the world to me but would rather have my dad instead of his stuff. Excuse me but I just cant stand greed...it has its way of destroying families and friends,etc. Me I have not much but will gladly share what I do have if the situation calls for it. As many of you do I have almost no budget but I have sent things to others for free just to help out...is not that what were supposed to do...help one another if we can. When my uncle and aunt passed away my other aunt refused to talk with anyone from the family while she picked through their home and had several roll-off trash containers filled with their stuff and passed lives...now she wants to reconnect with the family she tossed out when it suited her....greed...she showed her true colors she can live with it now...after all it was her choice.

[niteowl7710]

The family member most at fault for being over-the-top offensive this time was a veritable pit of greed the last time she was involved with deaths in my family. Bald-faced, gimmie gimmie gimmie the money my husband is supposed to get in the will, etc. This time all she could do was bad-mouth me to other members of our family due to the fact that circumstances dictated I couldn't be in Ohio at the time of the passing. I was all but cut out of the funeral, fed ZERO information as to what was going on, was specifically excluded when it came to ordering flower arrangements, left completely out of all the eulogies she penned for her husband, and others to read, and as a last slap in the face at the luncheon after the church services my wife and I were forced to sit at a separate table BY OURSELVES. Who died...oh no one important just MY MOM! My poor Dad was just so overcome with grief he could barely function, and it was all I could do to just suffer through the indignity of a half-dozen people not even acknowledging I was standing in the funeral home to avoid physically punting her back across the Commonwealth into her perfect life in the Philly burbs where she spent 30+ years looking down her nose at my Mom and I.

This time around the money involved doesn't flow towards her, and I'm pretty sure my dad, and I know for sure I would like to go back to last Thursday, or better yet before Christmas, as all the money in the world isn't going to bring my Mom back...

[disabled modeler]

The family member most at fault for being over-the-top offensive this time was a veritable pit of greed the last time she was involved with deaths in my family. Bald-faced, gimmie gimmie gimmie the money my husband is supposed to get in the will, etc. This time all she could do was bad-mouth me to other members of our family due to the fact that circumstances dictated I couldn't be in Ohio at the time of the passing. I was all but cut out of the funeral, fed ZERO information as to what was going on, was specifically excluded when it came to ordering flower arrangements, left completely out of all the eulogies she penned for her husband, and others to read, and as a last slap in the face at the luncheon after the church services my wife and I were forced to sit at a separate table BY OURSELVES. Who died...oh no one important just MY MOM! My poor Dad was just so overcome with grief he could barely function, and it was all I could do to just suffer through the indignity of a half-dozen people not even acknowledging I was standing in the funeral home to avoid physically punting her back across the Commonwealth into her perfect life in the Philly burbs where she spent 30+ years looking down her nose at my Mom and I.

This time around the money involved doesn't flow towards her, and I'm pretty sure my dad, and I know for sure I would like to go back to last Thursday, or better yet before Christmas, as all the money in the world isn't going to bring my Mom back...

Man I am sorry to hear you all had to go through all that...some people just cant seem to think of anyone else but themselves...specially in your dads and you time of need and comfort. Seems strikingly similar to my situation with my aunt....some people just never get it buddy....in the end there the ones that end up left out by their actions.

[Tom Geiger]

James, condolences on the loss of your mom. It is awful to be put into a bad situation when you are in an already sorrowful one. The best thing you can do is support your dad, his feelings and his way. It sounds like your brother's wife just took over and did things her way, without thinking of anyone else.

My wife's family is on a similar path. Her sister has a phobia about wakes and funerals and she's the domineering one. My wife's parents were very traditional people, who didn't specify their wishes, so you know they expected the full Christian wake, funeral and burial. Sis in law just made it all about her, and quickly cremated my father in law so she wouldn't have to endure a formal affair. My wife is livid and feels that she disgraced the family. Now my mother in law, who has suffered with Altzheimers, so she cannot express herself, will die in the near future. Now it's a battle of the 5 siblings. My wife wants to do a traditional rite. Her sister wants the quick and dirty again. One brother is traditional, but doesn't want to spar. And the last one wants to do it as cheap as possible so there will be money to split. Quite a situation and I'm staying out of it.

James, again I understand where you are coming from. This isn't a good situation on the best of days and the bull just makes it that much more draining. These things just take a little bit away from you that you never really recover from.

[highway]

Wow, there must be at least one in every family!! My case just so happens to be my brother's ex wife, but it wasn't money that made the issue at my brother's funeral in 1992 after he was killed in an tractor trailer accident. While he was out on the road, his wife was having an affair with what was supposedly his best friend. The whole family, including my brother, knew it was going on, it was sometimes literally my brother would be leaving out the front door and the boyfriend would be coming in the back door, and she didn't even seem to worry about hiding it.

The issue came at the funeral the day of the burial, and when it came time for the announcement of the pallbearers, THEY CALLED HIS NAME!!! How low can you go but to have the guy (can't even call him a man) you've been cheating with carrying the body of your late husband!?!? When he was starting to walk past where my mom and I were sitting, I started to ball up my fist because I just wanted to beat the you know what out of him, but my mom noticed my fist and put her hand on my knee and gave me that "you're better than that, don't do it" look. It just seems sometimes family can be your worst enemy!

[Nick Winter]

The way people, who are allegedly from the same genetic stock (aka "Family"), can bring every petty difference and perceived slight out when a loved one passes. The one time you'd think everyone could set aside whatever problems they have for 48 hours, instead magnifies and amplifies them to a fever pitch.

Needless to say there's about a half-dozen people I don't feel the need to ever engage in occupying the same oxygen supply with again in their lifetime.

Sounds like we have the same family...................

[Joe Handley]

Like Highway said Nick, there's one in each family

[Agent G]

Dad will be gone 20 years this August, Mom 9. My sister and I sat down after mom departed and began going through her things. We started looking at all the old photos and began laughing and telling stories. It was quite apparent neither of us desired anything but the fondest of memories.

I have my keepsakes, Diane has has hers. They will be passed to our children and grandchildren as it should be.

I am truly blessed in this regard.

G

[Joe Handley]

You did get lucky there G, wish I could say the same for either of my parent's families.

[Joe Handley]

I think insomnia might become an issue for the next week or so due to goings on at work.

[disabled modeler]

Dad will be gone 20 years this August, Mom 9. My sister and I sat down after mom departed and began going through her things. We started looking at all the old photos and began laughing and telling stories. It was quite apparent neither of us desired anything but the fondest of memories.

I have my keepsakes, Diane has has hers. They will be passed to our children and grandchildren as it should be.

I am truly blessed in this regard.

G

Exactly G.... And that is how it should be its a time to cherish their and your memories and help each other get through the loss. Keepsakes are more important than many people realize no matter how small...it helps in the grieving process to have something to remember them by and times you had with them. A month before the wife and I were married her moms house had a fire...her mom and step dad both died in the fire but her 3 brothers jumped out a second floor window and escaped. With no other choice we had an instant family adopted her brothers as my own..wouldn't have had it any other way ether...they had lost their parents and closest relatives were 9 hours away so I was not about to see them loose their sister and friends too. It was not easy but we managed.

[niteowl7710]

My sister and I sat down after mom departed and began going through her things. We started looking at all the old photos and began laughing and telling stories. It was quite apparent neither of us desired anything but the fondest of memories.

When my grandfather passed 11 years ago, we were all sitting around the dining room table just howling with laughter at the things he did, or thing he said over the course of his 88 years. Then my aunt stomped out of a back bedroom and told us all that we needed to be quiet or take the conversation out onto the porch because she couldn't sleep with all that racket going on. Needless to say that really killed the mood...

My aunt and I haven't been in good terms for a long time ever since that time, when after everything was over with for my grandfather's burial she came up to me and started trying to yell at me over something she thought I did and said that was "improper" - all while trying to get the type of painful arm grip you do to a small child when you're trying to intimidate them into silence. After I literally slapped her hand away (G. will know the sweep arm strike you make when you want someone to unhand you) and pointed out that she was going to make an express trip over the porch railing if she tried to touch me again, I explained the fact that at 25 years of age only my Mom has the ability to yell at me, and last I checked she wasn't my Mom.

My Aunt did everything the way she wanted it done last week, right down to making sure I knew she didn't like me one little bit. Her words of consolation - the only time she actually spoke to me - was "I'm sorry for you", not my loss, not my grief, she was just sorry "for me"...

I left the little luncheon after I saw the seating arrangements, and went and grabbed our kids and brought them back. Which quickly derailed her carefully choreographed afternoon of "ME CENTERED" attention mongering because who's going to pay attention to a bitter old lady when there's a super smiley 1 y/o boy, and attitude laden 2 y/o girl around? Turns out - NO ONE! My Uncle, Aunt and one female cousin all ended up leaving in a huff at the end of the afternoon without so much as even looking at me, let alone saying Goodbye.

I really felt bad for my wife who got railroaded into no mans land because of my Aunt's simmering vendetta against me, because despite my insistence that my Aunt is a direct blood relation to the Anti-Christ has been nothing but superbly nice to that woman the entire 8 years we've been together.

[Agent G]

James that sounds exactly like my ex mother in law #2.She and her husband were two of the most bitter, unhappy people I ever met. She never liked me and went out of her way to show it. Those two played one side of the family off against the other, pitting the two sisters, one being my then wife, against each other for decades. Trouble was they used the grandkids as pawns. How low is that?

Even now! When the old man passed two years ago I called the ex and offered my condolences. At the insistence of her mother the ex told my kids I never acknowledged her fathers death. I learned this from my oldest (43) who has also ended any relationship. I suppose they think the children I raised are as stupid as they are.

I have had zero contact with any of them for 10 years now. It is amazing but I realized I rarely think of any of them. Only thing left from then that matters are my children now.

It kind of P's me off just typing this.

There's a Hebrew term for the women like that. It's "achzarit" which loosely translates as "evil b".

G

[1930fordpickup]

When my grandfather passed 11 years ago, we were all sitting around the dining room table just howling with laughter at the things he did, or thing he said over the course of his 88 years. Then my aunt stomped out of a back bedroom and told us all that we needed to be quiet or take the conversation out onto the porch because she couldn't sleep with all that racket going on. Needless to say that really killed the mood...

88 Years is a good life , you should all have been sitting around telling stories and laughing . Those are what you want to remember him by.

[Nick Winter]

Like Highway said Nick, there's one in each family

One side of the family you mean Joe.

irked me yesterday, guy offering me $3 for a sealed kit at the show I was vending at.................really $3, your lucky to buy a builtup for that these days.

Nick

[highway]

irked me yesterday, guy offering me $3 for a sealed kit at the show I was vending at.................really $3, your lucky to buy a builtup for that these days.

Nick

It depends on the kit, Nick. There are some reissues of kits today that I don't think were worth $3 when kits were $3!!

[Tom Geiger]

It depends on the kit, Nick. There are some reissues of kits today that I don't think were worth $3 when kits were $3!!

A three dollar kit... in Canada you wouldn't even get folding money, just coins!

Maybe Nascar kits... we couldn't give them away as door prizes!

[jrherald420]

One side of the family you mean Joe.

irked me yesterday, guy offering me $3 for a sealed kit at the show I was vending at.................really $3, your lucky to buy a builtup for that these days.

Nick

I sold at my first show 2 weeks ago and had the same thing happen to me. I had some slot car guys offer me 5 bucks for the Newer Nova, Dart and Charger 2n1 kits each. I had sold the racing parts out of them but they were still full stock builds, i had a price of 12.00 each on them but lowered it to 10.00 if anybody was looking at them. The slot car guys said they couldnt pay more than 5.00 because they wouldnt use the rest of the parts in the kit. lol I ended up selling them 4 for 35.00 just to get them away from me.