mnwildpunk Posted February 11, 2015 Author Posted February 11, 2015 Why don't blind people sky dive? It scares the hell out of the german shepherds
Chuck Most Posted February 17, 2015 Posted February 17, 2015 What do you call a 4' tall psychic who's escaped from prison? A small medium at large.
Casey Posted February 17, 2015 Posted February 17, 2015 This always seems to happen when someone starts a joke topic. Please exercise good judgement when posting, and if what you're about to post is not appropriate for all ages, don't post it. Corny jokes are good. Jokes degrading women, groups of people, sex-related jokes, etc. are not appropriate.
Chuck Most Posted February 21, 2015 Posted February 21, 2015 A group of nautical engineering students were having a competition as part of their class. Each student had to build a scale model submarine which could dive, travel a given distance submerged, and resurface within a test tank. Things were going well, but many of the students were having trouble with the submarines surfacing too soon. Thinking that adding a bit more weight in the hull would help to keep the subs underwater longer, they began reaching into their pockets and pulling out loose change, which they then dropped into the hulls of their submarines. "Uh,oh", the instructor said,' Looks like you guys are already thinking like naval architects." One of the students asked how so, and the instructor replied "Something isn't working, and your first thought is to just dump more money into it."
chunkypeanutbutter Posted February 21, 2015 Posted February 21, 2015 A Cobol programmer made so much money doing Y2K remediation that he was able to have himself cryogenically frozen when he died. One day in the future, he was unexpectedly resurrected. When he asked why he was unfrozen, he was told: "It's the year 9999 - and you know Cobol." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q: How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Yes. or.... Q: How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None; that's a hardware problem.
unclescott58 Posted February 21, 2015 Posted February 21, 2015 Of the 3 jokes above, I only get the last one. Scott
Chuck Most Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 Of the 3 jokes above, I only get the last one. Scott
unclescott58 Posted February 22, 2015 Posted February 22, 2015 (edited) Well I care. I enjoy a good joke. If I get them. Scott Edited February 22, 2015 by unclescott58
Harry P. Posted February 24, 2015 Posted February 24, 2015 An apple and a cucumber were walking along the side of the road when a speeding car comes from out of nowhere and slams into the cucumber, sending him flying. The apple quickly flags down a passing car and asks the driver to take him and his injured friend to the nearest hospital. At the hospital, the apple is pacing nervously in the waiting room. Finally the doctor comes out. "How is he, doc?," the apple asks anxiously. "I have good news and bad news," replies the doctor. "Your friend is going to live... but I'm afraid he's going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life"...
Ace-Garageguy Posted March 1, 2015 Posted March 1, 2015 (edited) 名字或许听起来像是在中国是个好主意。 EDIT: I assumed this was one of those things that didn't translate well from an Asian language (read some early 1970s Datsun owner's manuals for a real laugh), but I now find it's part of the American company's "clever" marketing strategy. Okaaaayyy. Edited March 1, 2015 by Ace-Garageguy
JohnU Posted March 1, 2015 Posted March 1, 2015 This is way too funny! Definitely a "diet" snack one won't want to eat!
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