Hypothetical Theft

[iamsuperdan]

Imagine if you will...

You're a burglar. A good one. 

But you only steal things that slightly inconvenience your victims.

What are you stealing?

[JollySipper]

Time?

[1972coronet]

The roll of college degrees toilet paper in the loo.

[stitchdup]

fuses from every appliance in the house, forks and spoons, knobs off cooker, the pins that connect door handles together, shower curtains, tap handles, plugs

[webestang]

Socks and underwear. 

[jaymcminn]

The batteries from all the remotes.

[misterNNL]

All their keys

[stitchdup]

the bathroom door

[Little Timmy]

One tire 

 

[Classicgas]

Their common sense....

[Raoul Ross]

6 hours ago, iamsuperdan said:

Imagine if you will...

You're a burglar. A good one. 

But you only steal things that slightly inconvenience your victims.

What are you stealing?

I had a ferret that did that... only took the shiny stuff.

[JollySipper]

The aglets from all their shoe laces............

[stitchdup]

one link from the middle of every trouser zipper

[NOBLNG]

1 hour ago, stitchdup said:

one link from the middle of every trouser zipper

Ooh, You are devious!?

[James2]

All of your #11 knife blades...

[Mike 1017]

Plug up all sinks and bathtubs and turn the water on.

[jaymcminn]

3 hours ago, James2 said:

All of your #11 knife blades...

If you could find them. I usually can't. 

[thatz4u]

cell phone charger cords, discount coupons for groceries, battery for keyless remote....?

[BlackSheep214]

Deodorants, toothpaste, toothbrushes, floss, mouthwash, bar soaps, toilet paper….

[NOBLNG]

On 2/3/2023 at 11:14 AM, webestang said:

Socks and underwear. 

Just one sock from every pair. The clothes dryer will take the blame.?

[1972coronet]

That organic, locally sourced candy in the big box of Almond Roca that the cats work in.

[Classicgas]

Every window screen.

[Snake45]

9 hours ago, thatz4u said:

...discount coupons for groceries....

That's the first thing I've seen listed here that would cause me only a slight inconvenience, as originally specified. 

[BeakDoc]

I’m taking all of the bread ties and chip clips, all the paper labels off the canned goods and 3/8” from one leg of every table and chair.

Edited February 5, 2023 by BeakDoc

[LDO]

A long, long time ago, I would take some minor thing out of someone’s grocery cart when they weren’t looking. Just imagining them getting home and thinking “I KNOW I put X in the cart”. Now I’m just a jerk on the internet.